Domino Club

Setting The Example

2007-10-01T06:27:00.000-05:00

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading these tips on how to be a better member of your community. The labels on the sidebar will help you review any of the categories you’re interested in. Feel free to go back to earlier posts and use them as encouragement to stay active in the lives of those around you.

When you are being friendly, caring, daring, determined, and generous, you are setting an example for others as you participate in your community. Don’t think no one will notice. They notice, and they sometimes accept your unspoken challenge without telling you. Your quiet donation of time or money actually improves the chances of others donating or volunteering.

The goal is: Keep it up!

Thank you for making a difference in your world.

You can find Laura's writing updates at:

Blogging Domino

Donate To A Food Bank

2007-09-16T16:36:00.000-05:00

When you get hungry, you go to the refrigerator and pull out a snack. What if all you had in the kitchen was a can of tuna and some powdered drink mix? Where would you go for food if you didn’t have enough money to pay the electric bill last month?

You might be surprised at how many people show up at churches and ask for food. But where does the church get their supply?

Food banks supply many people with non-perishable food items. Churches get donations from their members, but some also purchase food for their pantry from a food bank.

Today’s goal is: Donate food to a food bank or a church food ministry.

Organizations who collect items to give to the poor rely on donations. If you can’t donate your time at one of the food banks or churches in your area, then get a bag of rice and a jar of peanut butter while you’re doing your shopping and drop it by a donation site.

It’s easy to buy a few extra items each time you do your grocery shopping. Sometimes you can save money by buying in bulk. Whether you donate two boxes of pasta or twenty cases of canned goods, your generosity helps others in need.

Enjoy knowing you’ve helped.

Happy Birthday To You!

2007-09-10T11:26:00.000-05:00

I know I’m not the only one in the world who forgets to send birthday cards to family and friends. Lots of people forget this fabulous opportunity to brighten someone’s day.

My office has a file that stores a variety of birthday cards. Some are specifically for a Grandmother or a sister. Others are fairly generic and could be used for anyone. So I can throw a card in the mail pretty quickly. My problem is remembering that it is someone’s birthday today.

I got a phone call from a relative who wanted to thank me for sending a birthday card. I thought it was strange that he would call and thank me for something I try to remember to do every year. Then he admitted that it was the only birthday card he got in the mail that year.

Today’s goal is: Send birthday cards to as many of your family and friends as you can.

There are all sorts of calendar alarm systems to remind you of an upcoming birthday. You might have a kitchen calendar, a purse calendar, a hand-held computer, a Blackberry, or a calendar alarm system on your cell phone. Whatever system you use, make sure you list those important birthdays and get the card out on time.

You never know if yours will be the only card they get in the mail.

Be A Guest Speaker

2007-08-31T14:00:00.000-05:00

This year in school, there will be opportunities for parents to get involved in classroom projects. Some parents volunteer to help with specific areas of interest, things they excel in or have special knowledge about.

Some retired men and women might be interested in being a guest speaker for an afternoon of interesting experiments or story-telling.

Last year, my son’s class learned about geology from one of his friends’ parents. Mr. Smith works as a geologist at an oil and gas company and took a day off to give a hands-on presentation. Thanks, Mr. Smith. You rock!

I know teachers welcome guest speakers who pique the interest of their students.

Today’s goal is: Volunteer to be a guest speaker at a local school.

Is there something you’ve studied and can share with kids in a memorable way? I’ll bet there is. Kids often find stories of an older generation fascinating. The history that was lived by their grandparents or great-grandparents stirs their imagination and brings “old facts” of history into reality.

My husband’s grandmother lived in a covered wagon during her childhood. My kids have never seen a real covered wagon. How much more does history come to life when you know someone who’s lived it?

Whether you’re an artist, geologist, chef, or a fan of classic literature, you have special knowledge that will thrill a young audience.

Help A School Teacher

2007-08-27T06:04:00.000-05:00

What if you were your child’s teacher. What if you had a million things to do before school started tomorrow. What if someone offered to help do tasks that didn’t require your personal attention.

You can be that caring individual that shows up with 20 to 30 minutes of spare time to help out with an extra pair of hands.

Today’s goal is: Offer to help your child’s teacher organize pieces of a school project.

The school year is beginning and there are a lot of things every teacher needs help with. My kids’ teachers had sign up sheets to help parents know the areas of need. One teacher needed a library resource parent. Another needed a holiday party organizer. I chose to sign up for the book fair parent team.

If working on an after-school project for your kids’ teacher doesn’t fit your schedule, ask about another area of need. There’s always room for one more caring helper.

Hello! Good to see you.

2007-08-20T09:30:00.000-05:00

My son watches Spongebob Squarepants – so I occasionally do, too. I learn things about people when watching characters interact. Friendly characters tend to stand out. When Spongebob takes a walk, he waves to people and says hello.

I’ve also heard of other people – real people – that stand out because they’re friendly. There was a man who couldn’t walk down the street, but that didn’t stop him. He sat on his front porch and waved and said hello to everyone that passed by him, whether they traveled by car, bicycle, or on foot.

I remember when my kids were around three or four years old, they stood in the grassy front yard of my mother’s house and waved to all the cars on the adjacent highway. She lives on a curve in the road, so the kids were very visible. I thought it was funny (and so did the kids) that quite a lot of the cars and trucks honked as they passed.

Today’s goal is: Wave at the people in your neighborhood as you travel past them or as they travel past you.

Being friendly in your neighborhood is a good way to get to know your neighbors.

Flowers

2007-08-13T12:59:00.000-05:00

Recently, my husband surprised me with a bouquet of flowers. It wasn't my birthday, obviously not Mother's Day, not my anniversary, I wasn't sick, and he wasn't apologizing for anything.

I love getting flowers, especially for no other reason than to say, "I love you."

Do you have a mother, sister, child, or friend who enjoys flowers? Would a small gift change their day for the better?

Today's goal is: Pick out someone who might enjoy a small bouquet - and make sure they hear the words, "I love you" when you give the flowers.

This is an easy way to cheer someone up. When you brighten someone else's face with a gift, your day immediately seems better.

Be A Regular Attender

2007-07-30T15:48:00.000-05:00

Have you been sitting around feeling guilty every Sunday morning because you know you should be in church, but aren’t?

My dad raised us to go to church every Sunday, whether you stayed out too late on Saturday or not. I had friends there, so I didn’t complain. I’ve grown up now and recognize the wisdom of regular church attendance. Eventually, the power of God’s presence will sink all the way into your heart. I love it when people give up on fighting against God.

And that’s really what we want. We want God’s power to help us change from where we are to where we can be. He can elevate our goals and help us reach them.

Today’s goal is: Go to church.

Find a good one. Pay attention and take notes. If something sounds a little off, go home and look up the subject in your Bible. Find out if the pastor got it right, but be merciful. All speakers make mistakes. If the pastor keeps making the same mistake, ask for an appointment and discuss it. If you feel the pastor's not following God, try a different church. There are a lot of church options. And a lot of different pastors.

As a regular attender, you’ll see the same church from a few different angles. Some days everyone will be friendly and the choir will bring the house down. Other days, well, you know. We all have our off days. The key to finding the right church and staying there is knowing God wants you there. Pray and find the right one for you.

If you’re waiting for the perfect church, you’ll never find it. But you may find one that offers training in the truth of God, a good prayer ministry, and a way to make and maintain Christian friendships.

You can even make a good church great by joining the ranks of the volunteers. Ask around to see where the needs are. If one ministry isn’t your cup of tea, try another. Be determined to enhance your church.

Because your church is designed to enhance you.

Dare to be a Substitute Teacher

2007-07-23T06:19:00.000-05:00

It’s summer and time for families to go on a vacation. But what do Sunday School teachers do when they need to get away?

They ask for volunteers.

I used to teach Sunday School classes. My husband and I didn’t have any children at the time I was asked to substitute in the high school classroom. I’d never done that before, but I accepted the challenge.

When I wasn’t teaching in the high school class, I taught an adult class. The ages were different, but the attitude was the same. They didn’t expect perfection from me, but they did expect me to speak from my heart about real issues that they had to deal with on a daily basis. I wanted my words to matter to them so we weren’t wasting our time. So I studied.

I looked up Bible verses on topics they were interested in. I looked up words in the dictionary. I wrote an outline and presented it in class. I often had a good response from them at the end of our time together.

If your child’s Sunday school class teacher needs a break or is going on a vacation, you can ask to substitute during the teacher’s absence. It wouldn’t mess you up to prayerfully prepare a lesson from your own experience.

Today’s goal is: Ask a Sunday School teacher if you can bring a lesson to give them a break for a week.

You can study the Bible to create a brief lesson based on events in your past. Maybe these were mistakes you learned from or events you had success with. The youth of today will be making the same decisions that we faced. Ultimately, they will thank us for giving them a reason to make the right decision.

If you enjoy volunteering your time, you could find out if there is a list of substitute teachers and put your name on it. Or you could find a teacher who wants to do a monthly trade-off. You teach one month, and they teach the next.

You’ll never know if you’ll like it unless you give it a try.

Encourage Someone You Care About

2007-07-16T06:33:00.000-05:00

To encourage someone is to bolster, support, or strengthen them. Standing alongside someone who needs to hear “You can do it” is a small thing for the giver, but big for the receiver.

When I was pregnant with my first child, I called my friend who had a one-year-old baby at home. I was feeling a little unsettled and all I needed was for her to get me out of my worry mode. She calmly spoke to me about her experience and cheered me up. After she helped me change my attitude in those few moments, I could face my day standing a little taller, a little bolder.

I am grateful to her for lifting me up with her words. It was a big thing for me at the time, and just a little phone call for her.

Today’s goal is: Call or email someone with a message of encouragement.

Is there someone who needs your encouragement today?

Showing Interest In Others

2007-07-09T08:51:00.000-05:00

My husband and I have enjoyed several of the restaurants in our area while taking a lunch break. When our kids are in school, it’s a relaxing way for us to stay in touch. Being friendly and chatting over a meal is great for a marriage. It’s also great for all our other relationships.

Today’s goal is: Take a co-worker to lunch. During the meal, focus on developing a personal relationship that will benefit the workplace.

Many companies thrive on teams of people working effectively together on one project. Showing interest in your teammates helps produce a camaraderie that oils that machine and makes it work smoothly.

When you invite someone to share a meal with you, visit with them about their life. It is said that a person who asks about your day is more interesting than someone who talks about themselves all day. When women get together, they might talk about a movie one of them has seen recently. So by the time you’re ready to go back to work, you’ve discussed pets, children, or grandchildren, and you’ve had a satisfying meal.

Good food often brings a smile. And smiles help develop friendships.

Donate A Toy

2007-07-02T05:45:00.000-05:00

I’m back from vacation now, and I must say – What a great time we had!

My kids were in the beach and the pool everyday while we visited with family members we hadn’t seen in a long time. I caught up on some reading. We enjoyed new restaurants. But two of the best moments came at the beginning and end of our trip.

We had just checked into our hotel and were about to head to the elevator when a mother and son stopped my husband. She wanted to give her son’s boogie board to my son because she couldn’t take it on the plane.

My son was thrilled at the gift. He rode waves in to the shore on it, floated on it, and shared it with his sister. But when it was time for us to leave our hotel, my son and my husband had one more thrilling thing to do. They spoke to a family that had just come out of a taxi and gave the boogie board to them.

Completing the circle of giving was fun. Who knows how many times the board will be given away?

The more we allow our children to share in donating to others, the more they develop a generous heart.

Today’s goal is: Pick out a toy to donate to a child.

Let your children pick out a gently-used toy of their own that they think another child would enjoy playing with. Let them give the toy away and watch their joy increase as they see the impact their gift has made.

Learn A Language

2007-06-22T18:58:00.000-05:00

We live in a global community that seems to be getting smaller and smaller. Once I thought India was a foreign land on the other side of the world from me. Today, my husband picks up the phone and conducts business with people in faraway lands in a way he never imagined when he was in high school.

It’s easy to have conversations when everyone knows your own language. But what about speaking with people who haven’t learned your language?

My mother joined a choir that was scheduled to sing in France. In preparation for her trip she not only practiced her songs, she also practiced her French. She was able to order food in restaurants and ask brief questions in shops with confidence. On a side trip to a place off the beaten path, she encountered a waitress who didn’t know English, and my mother’s beginner French wasn’t enough to communicate with her – so they spoke in Spanish to each other.

Today’s goal is: Begin to learn a new language.

Learning more than one language can be a challenge for some. But think how you can brighten someone’s day by sharing conversation in their language. If they’re a foreigner in your country, you may be a great help to them.

It takes a lot of time and effort, but if you’re determined, you can do it.

Be A Mentor

2007-06-18T06:46:00.000-05:00

For a few years, I’ve been attending a writers’ critique group at my mentor’s house. She is an awesome encourager. I really listen to her suggestions to see how I can improve my skills in general, not just correct the errors.

From her I’ve learned that in order to be a mentor, you don’t have to know everything, you just have to know a lot and dare to share. She certainly knows a lot. She’s sold over a million copies of her books. But there are questions she admits to making a good guess at.

Today’s goal is: Offer to mentor someone who is learning a skill you have achieved some success at.

Teaching someone to do something you do well can be a challenge, but one with great reward. My son is learning how to do the grocery shopping. This is a skill he’ll need when he gets old enough to live on his own. I’ve shown him the Nutrition Facts label and how to prioritize the various facts. He has asked to buy a product and proven that it’s nutritious enough by comparing it to another similar product with less nutrition.

I don’t know everything about shopping and cooking, but what I do know, I share. Mentoring my son in this skill allows him to make choices that help the family. I’m sure he’ll make good decisions when he’s on his own. Learning how to shop wisely now gives him plenty of time to practice before that day comes.

Listen to the Lonely

2007-06-11T06:43:00.000-05:00

Being a caring person means seeing a need and meeting it. Sometimes it is a simple task. As easy as listening to the lonely.

At a homeless shelter in December, volunteers showed up to be a part of the Christmas excitement. One of the residents had to explain to her daughters that the presents really were for them. They had never been given Christmas presents before. When those caring volunteers saw the joy on the faces of the children, I think they enjoyed the day almost as much as the little ones. If those people hadn’t heeded the call for volunteers and showed up to help at the shelter, they would’ve missed out on some memorable moments.

We often connect the word lonely with the elderly. Yes, they are the ones whose children have all grown up and don’t come around as much as they used to. They are the ones who still have to perform home maintenance tasks even though they’re not as spry as they use to be. They need people around them for company on quiet days. But they aren’t the only ones who sit at home by themselves.

These days, there are too many families whose adults are working far into the evening or are in traffic so much that their children never eat dinner with them on weekdays. Children sit in front of the TV and eat dinner by themselves in some homes.

Today’s goal is: Be a volunteer.

Many churches offer afterschool programs for these families. The volunteers in these church programs help with homework and provide sports equipment for the kids. But more importantly, they listen to the kids. They provide a place for discussion where the children can voice an opinion and be heard.

My church has a ministry to nursing homes. A group meets together for prayer and then visits with nursing home residents every week. We also have a group that meets every week to give food to the poor.

Find an organization that needs volunteers and ask about what you can do to help. Or find an elderly neighbor who needs help with a few odd jobs.

Help Others Relax

2007-06-04T06:31:00.000-05:00

I found Scott (Hello, My Name Is Scott) Ginsberg’s blog and I love it. He’s brought me some new ideas that I already knew! Funny how that happens.

Reading his blog made me review how I’ve been doing things. Then, I had one of those moments. It’s that head-slap moment when you recognize that you haven’t put into action everything you know. You ask yourself, “Why haven’t I been doing that?”

Read one of his blog posts about a fresh look at friendliness – and then come back here for the rest of this post.

Thanks for coming back!

There are too many people who live in daily stress. You see them everywhere. Some of them will shed the crease between their eyebrows if given the opportunity.

Today’s goal is: Help someone near you relax.

When you relax, you are able to think more clearly and have more fun being yourself. If you try to help someone else relax, they will also be able to think more clearly.

If you see someone who looks tense, speak to them instead of leaving them alone. Maybe they need directions to an office or they’re late for a meeting. Take a moment and help them.

The surprise will change their attitude. They won’t be able to hold back the smile.

Generosity Jar

2007-05-28T05:26:00.000-05:00

Giving can be an attack on greed. Anytime you find yourself feeling envious of those who seem to be richer than you, pick out someone to give to. Greed and hoarding lose their footing in the heart of a giver. They fall away and become weak.

The giver must be wise with what they have, but being wise isn’t the same as keeping whatever you have to yourself. Keep a roof over your head and food in your belly, but give away some of your “extra” money.

If you pay for things with paper bills and keep the coins (the change) in a special container, the coins will add up to a surprising amount faster than you think. If you put aside a generosity jar and fill it with your change, you can take it to the bank and exchange it for bills to be used for a specific donation.

Today’s goal is: Begin keeping change in a large container in your home. Write a note on the jar that describes where the money is going when the jar is filled.

If every time you see that jar you thank God for meeting your needs, your motivation to meet someone else’s needs may rise. And the joy of giving builds.

If you don’t know which family or charity to give the donation to, just ask God to direct you to the recipient He chooses. And keep your eyes open.

Apply the Medicine

2007-05-21T12:24:00.000-05:00

Many Americans have a Bible. Some actually read it. And then there are those who do what it says.

If you had a wound and asked a doctor to give you medicine for it, would you go home and read the label of the medicine bottle – and not take the medicine?

That’s what people are doing when they read what God wants us to do, and then not act on it. When we read the Bible and understand God’s instructions, it is to our benefit to act on it. We must be determined to apply the word.

Joshua 1:8 (NIV) Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.

Think on the word so that you can do it.

James 1:22 (NASB) But prove yourselves doers of the word and not merely hearers who delude themselves.

Today’s goal is: As you read slowly through the Bible with ears perked to hear the lesson God wants you to apply to your life, find the lesson that opens your understanding and act on it.

Joshua 1:8 says we should” be careful to do everything”. When doing everything written in the Bible seems too huge to even consider, take a small piece of scripture and meditate on the lesson in it. Apply it to your life. Act on it.

Some medicines need to be applied continually over many days. Don’t give up.

Dare to Pray

2007-05-14T05:22:00.000-05:00

Everyone has a few moments in their life when they need someone to pray with them. I’ve needed prayers, and I’m sure you have too.

My dad prayed with me for healing when I was young. My mom prayed for me when I was on vacation. My friends prayed for me during pregnancies.

The prayer time you give to another shows how much you care.

Whenever my kids and I are slowly passing through the merging traffic at the scene of an accident on the highway, I ask them to pray for those involved. I pray for the comfort of all those involved and for the healing of those in pain. I’ve been in a car wreck before, so I know to pray for the insurance paperwork to go smoothly.

We often see strangers going through stressful times. We can pray without them knowing it. But if we’ll take the time to tell someone, “I’m praying for you,” that may strengthen them for the rest of the day. God may be able to use our words to them as well as our prayer for them.

Today’s goal is: Ask someone if they’d like you to pray for them.

How many times has someone asked you to pray for them and “I will” was your response? Do you think it would anger them if you stopped what you were doing and prayed out loud right there with them? Probably not.

I sometimes have to pray right at the moment when I think of it, or I won’t think of it again.

And there are those who won’t ask for prayer, but you can see that those people need and want God to intervene in their lives. Think of the joy they'll feel when you show them just how much you care.

Hospital Visits

2007-05-07T07:22:00.000-05:00

Like millions of others, I have spent the night in a hospital. And during the four overnight stays, I enjoyed having visitors. They brought encouragement, smiles, and warm feelings. I’m sure I healed more quickly because of their love.

I also have visited others in hospitals for various reasons. I cheered up my mother-in-law with pictures of her grandchildren. I brought flowers to a woman who had just had a baby. I sang Christmas carols with a youth group. And I brought a sack of snack food to a family whose dad was having heart surgery.

I received plenty of verbal thanks, but that’s not why I did it. I know what I felt like during my hospital stays, so if I can comfort others in a like situation, I’ll do it.

Today’s goal is: Visit someone in a hospital.

Your church may have a list of members who are in the hospital and would enjoy visitors. Churches usually have a prayer list which includes several people in the hospital.

I’ve heard of the family of a new bride bringing wedding flower arrangements to hospitals after the wedding and putting them in the rooms of those who don’t get many visitors.

Even if you don’t bring anything but conversation, there are those who are lonely and would love to have a visit – from anyone. That caring conversation will bless their day and bring an added bonus of healing.

Put Others First

2007-04-30T08:45:00.000-05:00

I think it’s silly to have two people fuss over a parking space. There are more important things in life to get stressed over.

What would happen if several cars were winding through a parking lot and you allowed the car behind you to take the better and closer spot? The other driver might see you inside the store and be a little more friendly to you than he would have.

A friendliness seed is sown when you do small but important things for others. Most people will allow that small kindness to affect them, and then everyone around them. The seed bears fruit when they respond to your friendliness with a smile or other small gesture of their own.

Today’s goal is: Let someone else have the parking space close to the store’s door while you park farther away.

Most Americans could stand to get a little more exercise anyway. Why not let others have that coveted parking space near the door? We’re actually doing ourselves a favor by walking a bit more.

Drive-Thru Gifts

2007-04-23T09:20:00.000-05:00

I had an opportunity to pay for someone else’s groceries years ago when two guys behind me in the grocery line were buying supplies for a fund-raiser being held that afternoon to raise funds to help out a family with a sick child. They asked if I wanted to help them out. I honestly thought they were kidding around, so I turned them down. After it was too late to go back and correct my missed opportunity, I felt terrible. I wanted God to forgive me for turning away from the chance to bless someone else.

How many times do we pass up opportunities to give to someone who needs our help, and then sadly realize that we could’ve shared the love of God in a tangible way?

We can pray for God to open our eyes to the moment at hand. We can pray for God to show us the person who needs the gift. We can pray that we won’t miss the chance to give.

Today’s goal is: The next time you buy food in a drive-thru line at a restaurant, pay for the meal of the person behind you.

Can you imagine the surprised smile of a frazzled mom who didn’t want to cook dinner and just got her meals free? She’ll be waving her thanks as you drive off.

I'm wondering how many people will follow the example in that line. Giving to someone else could be like dominoes falling. We all affect someone else.

Daily Goals

2007-04-16T23:48:00.000-05:00

I love daily goals. They help me keep my stress low. I know I can accomplish a huge challenge by taking it one small step at a time. If I’ll break off a piece of a large project, I can do a small thing rather than be overwhelmed by staring into the face of the impossible.

Joshua 1:8 states, “Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.”

Today’s goal is: Read eight pages in the Bible each day.

I can’t read the whole Bible in one month or even three because I like to think about what I’m reading. It takes time to meditate on the scriptures.

But I can read eight pages of the Bible in a day. That gives me enough pages to consider the context, but it isn’t too much. I have time to think and try to wrap my mind around the lessons I could learn from those pages. For me, a larger goal might pressure me to read too fast and miss some important truths.

If you want to read more than eight pages, please do. I set low goals for myself so I can accomplish them. I’m a mom whose schedule gets interrupted often, and then I get distracted . Set your page goal where you are challenged, yet able to accomplish it.

Kind Warnings

2007-04-09T11:05:00.000-05:00

We all want trustworthy friendships. We want to know our friends will be there for us when we really need them. But are we there for them?

After you’ve established a good relationship with others, you can begin to deepen your relationships with a word of truth to those who need to hear it. This doesn’t work if the trust isn’t well established already.

I read an article by a woman who had changed her friend’s life by helping her update her wardrobe. The foundation of trust had already been laid in that friendship, and the woman’s offer of help was accepted.

Through the ages, God has used prophets to warn people to change their ways. Those who believed the prophets were able to make a new start. Those who ignored them dealt with the consequences.

In the Bible, Numbers 22:21-33 tells the story of Balaam’s donkey. It was supposed to go in a certain direction, but it saw danger that his owner couldn’t see. It veered from the expected path to protect Balaam. Then God opened the mouth of the donkey to speak words of warning so Balaam could understand.

If God can use a donkey, He can use me.

I accept the challenge to speak a loving word of warning, but I will only give it to those who will hear it.

My mother was overweight, so I gave her information that would help her. She listened to me and, months later, began giving away clothes to a woman’s shelter. Her loss was their gain.

Kind warnings from trusted friends and family can make you feel more secure in that relationship. I love it when someone cares enough about me to dare to give me the truth I need to hear. That makes me feel protected by someone who can see more than I can.

Today’s goal is: Dare to speak kind words of truth to someone with whom you’ve developed a relationship of trust. If you aren’t sure that anyone would listen to you, dare to strengthen those relationships.

Only from a heart of love can one speak warning so that it will be received and acted upon. Your job isn’t to make sure the gentle warning is received because you can’t control someone else’s response. You can only control what you do and say.

Dream Big

2007-04-04T10:05:00.000-05:00

I’ve been to a writer’s conference and missed my usual Monday posting deadline. But I learned a lot while I was gone. In fact, I stuck my toe in some deep waters. I leaned out of the boat, wanting to jump in. However, something in me was hesitant. Something wanted to wait until I was a little more ready before I jumped in.

At the conference, I took several classes to improve my writing skills and several to improve my public speaking skills. But I was too shy to share my stories, either written or spoken, with those in the classes.

In order to accomplish much, I have to dream big. I must act on what I can do right now and build on that. Nobody walks very far if they’re staring at their toes. Look at the horizon with me and see where it takes us.

I was dreaming big at the writer’s conference, but I needed a little encouragement to share. A woman asked me to be her critique partner and help her see her novel from a fresh set of eyes and a different perspective. I jumped at the chance to exchange our chapters for critique.

This was an opportunity I’d wanted for too long. Finally, I could relax in my new relationship with this woman and give and receive encouragement on a regular basis.

Today’s goal is: Start a care group. Gather a group of friends or family members who will meet regularly to help others.

Your group might be three or four friends who take turns helping out one family from your church or neighborhood. After some time, that family might feel the urge to join the group and help someone else.

Your group might be a writers’ group, a mothers’ group, a men’s prayer group, or anything else you see a need for.

You never know how your group will grow. It may grow in popularity so that it blossoms into several groups. But whatever happens, you’ll feel the thrill of seeing someone else’s face light up when they see you coming.

It will change them. But it will also change you.

A Friendly Word

2007-03-26T05:29:00.000-05:00

Several years ago, I was purchasing a CD in a bookstore. I didn’t realize that I’d slipped into a bad attitude because of stress. A man saw my unsettled state and was led by God to compliment my shirt. As soon as the words left him, peace came over me and the stress was gone.

I remember that because of how simple the cure was. He didn’t lay hands on me and pray. He didn’t quote scripture. He simply gave me a compliment.

Healings and deliverances aren’t always that simple. But God used the obedience of a sweet man to get my attention. And I can pray that God would use me in the same way.

How many people do we pass everyday who need to hear some good news – anything positive. We hear more bad news than we can stand, and when we look in the mirror, most of us find ourselves lacking in one way or another.

If we would step out of our daily routine long enough to speak a friendly word of kindness to someone, the atmosphere around us will change.

I’m willing to give it a try. Are you?

Today’s goal is: Compliment five people.

When I receive a compliment, my day seems happier. When I compliment someone else, I see their day changing too. This is an easy goal. It shouldn’t take a lot of effort. But if the compliment is sincere, I can just imagine five smiles leading to many more smiles, and compliments spreading like yawns.

Being friendly is a simple thing. We can make a difference in this world.

Be Generous

2007-03-19T06:06:00.000-05:00

Giving is an essential element in the Christian faith. It’s a part of God’s personality. He teaches us to give by first giving to us. We see Him in action and we want to help – just like any child would. When my children were younger, they saw me clean the floor and wanted to do what I was doing. So I bought them a kiddie broom. They loved it. They saw my satisfaction from a job well done and wanted to share in that. God wants us to share in His joy of giving too.

If I call myself a Christian, I must let God be involved in my projects from the beginning. It would be a mistake to try to build a house by myself and when I’m ready to nail down the roof, then decide I need a stronger foundation. The foundation comes first. For Christians, the foundation is God.

God gives because He loves. In order for us to follow that example, we must allow ourselves to love. When we can see people through the loving eyes of God, we can then begin to give from a heart of love.

Do you see single moms in your community who hold down two or three jobs? Some women take a job as a waitress as a second job. They appreciate customers who tip well. As a restaurant customer, giving from a heart of love goes beyond giving your waitress a tip.

Today’s goal: Give money to a waitress that didn’t wait on you – and tip your waitress too!

Imagine your joy as you see the amazed smile. If she asks about it, tell her it’s a gift. Gifts are never earned, they’re just given. Nothing is expected in return.

Be Determined

2007-03-12T06:00:00.000-05:00

Laziness is a virus that infects people with an energy-sapping fog. Most people have succumbed to this at one time or another. I know very few people who are immune to the clutches of laziness. Very few. But they’re there. They seem to be inoculated against it.

If you’re like me and have to fight against its draw, then you know the effort is worth it. I know the feeling of satisfaction when I pass up opportunities to sit and watch “a little” TV. I want to join with others who are determined to make reasonable plans and follow through without laziness undermining the success.

I’m fueled by the joy of knowing I can accomplish a lot in the time I could’ve spent on the unnecessary rest. But having your car fully fueled with the right gasoline doesn’t mean it’s coming out of the garage. To get this body moving, I need the accountability of another person checking on my progress.

Over the past few years, I’ve spent beautiful Texas mornings walking with a friend through the neighborhood. I need the exercise, and I need the time with her to maintain our friendship. Without her accompanying me on my walks, there would be very few walks.

Today’s goal is: Invite two people to start an accountability group. Keep each other informed of your goals. Enjoy each others’ triumphs. Encourage each other during struggles.

The laziness virus must be stopped. But remember, there’s strength in numbers. Together, we can fight it and win!

Be Daring

2007-03-05T07:00:00.000-06:00

Have you ever driven an old car that broke down frequently. Usually when that happens, it means the car didn’t get as much care as it needed. Cars need maintenance. So do people.

If you value your relationship with your spouse, you have to spend some time and effort letting that person feel loved. Let them know how much you care about them.

Some people get used to being around each other, and they assume the other person knows how they feel. They might. But just as you have to change the oil in your car, you have to replace yesterdays good feelings with new good feelings for today.

Dare to do something different. Get out of the same old rut.

Spouses need relationship maintenance, but so do kids. If you constantly work late and miss your child’s special moments, figure out a plan that will transform that relationship. Dare to change your schedule to put someone else’s needs ahead of your own. Show up at your child’s school play.

Dare to love. Make sure the people around you feel loved. People thrive on affection. Who doesn’t enjoy a good hug?

Today’s goal is: Plan a special lunch with your spouse or your child. Maybe eat with your child at his school. Let them decide when and where (within reasonable limits), and then follow through.

Any relationship worth having is worth maintaining.

Be Caring

2007-02-26T09:48:00.000-06:00

You’ve seen him. He’s the old man on the corner who’s mower has just broken down. It's Spring in Texas. It's time to trim off the brown grass and let the new growth get some sunlight. He's been eyeing his weeds all week.

You’d go talk to him, but you figure now isn’t the time. He seems pretty disgusted at his predicament.

But really, now is the time. Now is when he needs someone to offer to help him out. He’s pretty independent and wants to get his mower fixed. But don’t you think he’d appreciate your offer to cut his grass just this once while he figures out what he wants to do with his mower?

There’s always someone who needs help with something. They’re just working by themselves because they know everyone else is too busy to help them.

It’s true we’re all busy. But we’re compassionate, caring people too. Being a caring person involves more than just showing respect, lending an ear, or offering to help, but I’ll start with those three things.

We often show respect to policemen, firemen, doctors, and nurses. What would happen to our world if we regularly showed respect to everyone? If we showed respect for the person inside the skin, it would become contagious.

If the old man won’t let you mow his grass, but invites you to stay for a lemonade, maybe his greatest need is a caring person to talk to. Let him know that you have a spare twenty minutes to visit and watch that refreshing smile come over his face.

Being caring means not turning away from an opportunity to help someone who needs it.

Today’s goal is: show your caring heart to someone who needs to see it. Walk down your street and offer your hand to a neighbor who needs help planting flowers or pulling weeds or mowing the lawn.

Always approach with gentleness and ask first. People need caring neighbors, but be careful that you don’t run too fast to an opportunity that you smash up against it like it was a brick wall. Go slow. Have a plan. Be prepared.

There was a little girl wanted a pet so bad she couldn’t wait for her parents to find her one, so she went into the back yard and found a bug. She ran to her mommy and said she found a pet. She lifted her hand to show the bug she held between her thumb and finger.

“Can I hold it?” The mom smiled, determined to allow the girl a moment of joy before the truth was revealed.

The girl pulled back her hands. “No. I don’t want it to fly away.”

“It won’t fly away.”

The girl opened her grip and the bug fell into the mom’s hand, but one of the wings was still stuck to the girl’s thumb and finger.

The mom looked at the bug and spoke gently. “It sure looks flat. Are all of them this skinny?”

When the girl realized she’d squeezed the bug to death in her excitement, she angrily slapped the bug out of her mommy’s hand, dusted the bug parts off her own hand and wailed through the pain of loss.

We can love our opportunities so much that we smother them or squeeze them to death. We should approach an opportunity as we would a butterfly that’s about to land on our finger. And when we’re through showing respect, lending an ear, or helping out, then let the butterfly fly free. There will be another one later.

Be Friendly

2007-02-19T06:22:00.000-06:00

Life is more fun when you have good relationships. One of the most important relationships you can have is a friendship. The most important person to begin a friendship with is God.

Befriending God is easy. He’s very receptive.

Ask God to help you accomplish your goal of becoming more friendly. You may find opportunities will present themselves – seemingly from out of the blue.

Today’s goal is: Have a small party in your front yard or in a restaurant. Invite others to join the fun. Be inclusive. Be God’s friend and invite Him. Ask God to show you someone new that needs a friend.

While you maintain new friendships, don’t forget your old ones.

How do you find new friends? They’re everywhere. If you keep a smile at the ready, a friend is not far away.

What is the Domino Club?

2007-02-12T11:30:00.000-06:00

The Domino Club offers encouragement to those who want to be challenged to reach out to others. It’s about showing other people your human side. It’s about showing up when someone needs your help. It’s about showing God you heard Him tell you to love your neighbor.

I created this club to unite those of us who want to be more than we are. Life is growth. We can push ourselves beyond our current boundaries. We can enlarge the tent of our experience and let others into our lives.

A house is made of many bricks. But without mortar, it isn’t strong. A community is like that house. Just because many are living in the same place, doesn’t mean that community is a great place to be. Every community needs love. It is the mortar that bonds people together and makes the community strong.

Generosity is one of the facets of love. I’m interested in growing in generosity. If you are too, then join with me in taking small steps to make big changes.

Generosity is more than giving money to a charity. You can give money, but you can also give something you made. You can give your time or possessions.

Think of how many people you know who are already spending their days giving to others. Many people already sacrifice their plans for the benefit of those that need them.

Some people can’t see their own needs. If you see their need and give to help them, you could turn their day around. Do you know people who seem self-centered, alone, maybe even a little crabby? It is possible that with the gift of your attention, affection, or innocent surprises, their whole life could change for the better.

Today’s goal is: Find someone who needs a little attention and let them experience unsolicited unconditional love by giving them a simple card.

Choose someone of any age. Make or buy a card and put your own encouraging message in it. Hand delivered cards are always appreciated. If there’s someone in your life that could really use a note of encouragement, but they live too far away for a personal delivery, then send them a card in the mail.

Do Big Things

2007-02-05T06:40:00.000-06:00

Being determined means doing something because it’s right – even when it’s hard. Our inclination is to stay comfortable and carefree. Our challenge is to do something worthwhile and make sure we follow through to completion.

The story of David and Goliath is well-known. David killed a giant while he was still a boy, long before he grew up to be a king. However, David was more of a giant than Goliath, not because of stature, but because of attitude.

It’s not how big you are; it’s what you do that matters. Giants do big things.

Sure, David made mistakes. Nevertheless, history calls David one of the greatest kings. He was a man after God’s own heart. No one would’ve blamed David if he’d killed King Saul when he had his chance, but he refused to do it. He did big things.

The Bible records the story of a woman who gave two copper coins in church. Jesus told someone that the woman gave more than the wealthiest of the crowd. Those small coins were all she had. She was the giant in church that day.

Who are today’s giants? Are they wealthy businessmen? Are they professional sports figures? How many of today’s lower income families give to those who are even more poor than they are? I’d say probably more than we realize. There are single moms, barely making ends meet, who take in neighborhood children and give them attention while the children’s parents are at home, fighting. Those single moms are doing a big thing for those kids.

There is determination in a school crossing guard who shows up every day to face an intersection loaded with pedestrian children and impatient drivers of powerful machines. Being a school crossing guard may not seem like such a big thing to the guard, but to the parents of the children who cross that street, it is a very big thing.

Forgiveness is a big thing. It can bring enemies together and make them friends. It can be a first step to healing.

For some, forgiving someone is a great idea, but following through to completion takes a lot of determination.

Is it in you?

Today’s goal is to: Forgive someone who has hurt you.

You may already be thinking of someone. Or you may be able to be a mediator between two people who need help forgiving each other. Who is the person on your heart?

If forgiving someone seems too hard and you want to give up, just remember that if it were easy, it wouldn’t be such a big thing.

So do it. It’s worth it.

Challenges

2007-01-29T05:40:00.000-06:00

Life is about growth.

Without growth in some form, people begin to die. People who enjoy life the most are the ones who stay spiritually, mentally, and physically active. They grow in their relationships. They grow in their abilities. They don’t shrink from challenges.

I dare to focus on what I can be, not what I’ve done wrong. The challenge is to look beyond my failures and see the potential. I can be more than I realize.

I want to be more friendly, caring, daring, determined, and generous. With much effort from me and much grace from God, I can do it.

It takes daring to accept the challenge. It takes determination to maintain forward progress. It takes generosity to defeat any inclination toward self-centeredness. It takes caring to move toward self-sacrifice. It takes friendliness to enlarge your community or your circle of influence.

We all know that friendships make life fun. Friends give us someone to care about and be generous to. Friends spur us on and encourage our determination. Friends are those we will dare to stand up for.

Today’s goal is: make a new friend.

Some people are shy and find it difficult to make friends. If you and I dare to speak first in an offer of friendship, it might be worth taking the risk.

You won’t have to go far to find someone who needs a friend. We all need friends. See if there’s someone who looks like they could use a shoulder to lean on.

Together, we can make a difference in this world.

Good Deeds

2007-01-22T05:32:00.000-06:00

Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts are taught to care about others. They get a badge for doing a good deed. That’s good training, but when they become adults, they have to do the good deed without the promise of a badge.

Good deeds are usually very simple and quickly done. Most of the time, it’s a matter of showing respect for those around you.

Giving someone your seat on a bus is a common way to show respect. If it prompts conversation from the grateful soul, then listen. Listening to a chatty bus rider may not be what you want to do, but if that simple act for a few blocks can make someone happy, then you can go about your business knowing that person could be passing on to another the respect they received. People caring for people is a good virus to spread.

Today’s goal is: open the door for someone.

At the grocery store, the doors open automatically. But not at the dry cleaner, the post office, or the hair salon. Some buildings have heavy doors that open with great effort. How easy it is to stand at a restaurant door and let the next person out before you let go and head to your car.

Showing others that you care about them makes them feel better, and it sets a good example for witnesses of the thoughtful act.

Keep up the good work, and don’t forget to smile.

Domino Club Begins

2007-01-15T14:10:00.000-06:00

Hi Friends!

It is my pleasure to invite you to be a part of the new Domino Club.

I plan to unite those of us who desire to encourage others. Some of us need new ideas in order to challenge ourselves to grow in some areas. I know none of us are perfect, and we all could use a nudge at times. So with the help of the Domino Club, we will hold each others’ hands and lift each other up.

I will post a goal each week to help focus our growth in the areas of being friendly, caring, daring, determined, and generous. Each goal will challenge us in a specific area. You can do these simple tasks for as long as you like – or forever. Some goals will be things you can keep doing every day, and others will be things you’ll do less often.

We’re not going to be able to take advantage of every opportunity or even see them all. We’ll do what we can do and know that growth always starts with one act. My vision is to start a small push of good deeds and keep pushing until it snowballs out of control.

We can start by being friendly. How many people do you see during the week that need a friendly pat on the back. When you tell a customer in a store that her clothes are cute or her hair looks nice, it usually puts a smile on her face. Everyone loves to encounter friendly people.

Today’s goal is: encourage three people.

Try to do this every day. And when you are looking for someone to encourage, don’t forget your family. I love to tell my kids how proud I am of them when they do something surprisingly good. I try to establish in their minds that they are good children. It's true that they are, but I want them to hear it spoken from my lips. If we know what we’re doing is good, that’s one thing, but it means more when we get that affirmation from someone.

I need encouragement from my family and peers. If I do, probably everyone does. When everyone who needs it gives encouragement instead of waiting to receive it, our world will be much more pleasant.

A friendly, encouraging community makes life better for everyone.